March 31, 2008

let's

Let's pretend we're the children of God and we're forsaking our duty to bring peace and love to humanity in favor of frolicking in the fields of nature.

Let's build antigravity machines and set them on fire. At night we'll have tiny flaming suns of silver and plastic falling slowly from the sky.

Let's take a ride on the Space Shuttle. We'll sleep floating at the very edge of earth's gravity well so it'll feel like we're falling all night.

Let's paint ourselves invisible and throw silver dollars from the top of a tree.

Let's run in the snow naked so that when we come back inside we'll have an excuse to sit under a blanket and drink hot things.

Let's cause an earthquake. After it's finished we'll fill the rifts with soft things so that the children orphaned by the quake have a place to play. We'll watch them dry the tears from their eyes and smile.



some spam

To: Me
From: Some random person
Subject: Prepare your left hand.

Text:
Supply your left hand and a paper towel.
Send your witch away.
Continue to:


While researching Alzheimer's disease, I accidentally stuck a knife into my eye.

disaster theme parks

This is a great idea.

I want to get on a roller coaster that simulates a plane crash. Although nominally a "roller coaster" this will be halfway between a "ride" and a simulator.

Or a disaster haunted house. One that uses the methods of concealment and artifice and world-building typically employed in haunted houses to create a realistic burning building. Or building undergoing an earthquake.

Think of it like this:


A good friend of yours tells you he's making a rubber band ball, so you start collecting rubber bands for him. Every day that you see him, you give him a handful of rubber bands that you've scavenged from work or the mailbox or wherever.

One day, for some reason you don't talk at all. That day-of-not-talking becomes a week. The rubber bands pile up: in your backpack, on your desk. The week of not talking become weeks of not talking.


Eventually, you just start making your damn own rubber band ball.

What do you mean, "it's a literary high"?

It's a Kafka high. You feel like a bug.

I bet you birthdays are a lot more important in countries and eras with high mortality rates.

Electric Typewriters


On Sunday, I run into Sarah. We go thrifting and she buys the most horrible muu-muu/70s housedresses I have ever seen in my life.

I buy one a Smith-Corona Coronet electric typewriter, from probably the early to middle 1970s. Mine's a slightly different model than the picture: the faceplate is a little more linear/less curved and doesn't have the "Coronet" logo on the left, but it's the same infant-boy blue. What an odd color. Perhaps it's meant to distract the user from what a beastly, macho machine it is: using an old electric - particularly one that's in bad shape - is less like writing or typing on a computer and more like operating a diesel-powered generator. The keys clack their imprints in a swift and fearful static. I had to reconnect some of the keys to the typebar and in doing so had to actually catch the typebars with my fingers. This is only slightly less scary than reaching through the nacelles of a large metal fan.

The repairs went smoothly, although the machine lacks a 1/! key. I'll do without exclamation or singularity for now. The engine locks up every few minutes and I'm obliged to bang on the blue plastic sidewalls until it restarts, an oddly delightful frustration that makes me want to write more rather than less.

After using the Coronet for a while, my hands smell like an auto shop. This is easily the best part.

March 28, 2008

speaking of fenris


John Bauer's "Tyr and Fenris"

resentment as expressed via cell phone txt messages

ccg: do you think i am a replicant
rl: you can barely pass as human, so no
rl: also you're not inhumanly fast, strong, or durable
ccg: wow inhuman and weak happy st patrick s to you too
rl: you may be nexus 1 or an earl lab-grade experimental model. i think yr barely out of the
uncanny valley. st pats is monday.

ccg:
just out of the uncanny valley? i know this is hard to fathom but some people do find me
physically attractive as well as inhuman conversant you think the dark

rl: in my eyes you were once the most beautiful quasi-human creature i had ever seen

on comic book character crossovers

One of the big challenges with having integrated comic book universes is that you force characters of vastly differing abilities and motives to co-exist and, very often, to interact. I’m guessing it is pretty similar to the problems of fitting pre-existing legends into newly dominant systems of religion, but those are processes that happen over hundreds of years and are therefore somewhat difficult to examine.

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Reconciling characters isn't such a big deal when it's on the low level of "Wolverine forming an alliance with Punisher". The disparity is somehow palatable even though one is an (effectively) immortal mutant and the other is just a vigilante Vietnam vet. Both characters exist on a human level: all they really care about is individual violence and survival. Their limitations make them comrades.

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It's not even very jarring when Professor X of the X-Men starts dating Lilandra (empress of the alien Shi'ar empire), because even Professor X is a human (with all the limitations that suggests) and Lilandra is alien royalty (with all the capabilities and influence that suggests), it's not out of character for Professor X to understand and care about intergalactic politics. Nor is it unexpected that Lilandra should accept Professor X as an equal, as his driving concerns (social and planetary survival and the political dynamics of emergent species) make him the closest thing to an "alien diplomat" in the X-Books. Although these characters have a giant gap in background and abilities the gap in their personalities and interests is more or less inconsequential.

From these two examples we can see that neither functional immortality nor an alien origin is necessarily a barrier to acceptable cooperation.

Let's get to the crux of the argument, to the chopping block on which I stumble and atop which I am butchered: Superman and Batman. They respect one another. They trust one another. They work together. They're pals.

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As Loki is a personification of mischief and Fenris (who at Ragnarok swallows Odin whole) is a personification of destruction, so Superman is a personification. It's easy to forget this because the idea he personifies is also the form he takes: the good man.
Superman is an idea and all ideas are gods. Superman's sense of "rightness" and of "virtue" is as strong as his ability to defeat any challenges to his sense of justice. Those aspects of his character that make Superman a “hero” override any human traits. The reason Superman-as-Clark-Kent is such a nebbish is that Superman without any heroic traits is simply a blank slate. Superman exists above psychology and personality. He's for the epics.

Batman is also an idea. He’s a personification of revenge. But it’s important that he’s a transformed idea – a man who chose to become an idea. Batman is about human darkness. Although absolute, the characteristics that make Batman a hero are intimately linked to his humanity. Batman is not an epic character. Even though he’s a personification of revenge, Batman's not about to take on errands from the Moirae: he’s too concerned with human affairs.

Some comics play up Batman’s stealth and preparedness, a trend which began in Justice League of America, a series whose cast includes such omnipotent or near-omnipotent characters as Superman, Wonder Woman (a goddess), and the Green Lantern. They cooperate with Batman, whose main skill is hiding in jumping menacingly out of dark alleys. Comics like the JLA make a point of mentioning that Batman has contingency plans in place to deal with anyone, like he spends his nights brainstorming ways to defeat his superhuman allies should such a day ever come. That inflation of abilities is a cheap way to make Batman an equal to the others, because it ignores all the ramifications such planning would ultimately have on a person: that kind of paranoia is simply not compatible with Batman's particular brand of moral vengeance. There's a reason that the Punisher, Marvel's personification of human revenge, is more convincing than Batman: It's not because he wears a more realistic outfit or because he uses automatic weapons instead of bat-shaped boomerangs, it's because he's a bad person.

I’m missing some other things, I think: Superman is social, Batman is not. Batman is urban, Superman is rural (I know he lives in a city but that’s not what I mean). One still has his parents, the death of the other’s are why he is who he is today. But I think what’s most significant is that one is a mythic character, and the other is not. Batman in a Superman book is like reading Philip Marlowe written by Tolkien. Superman in a Batman book is like reading The Catcher in the Rye as starring Thor.

joy at adding "Fenris" and "Ragnarok" to Word's custom spelling dictionary.
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Someday they'll find a full-color image of the Virgin of Guadalupe in someone's brainscan. Until then it's all paredolia.


aspect weighting: lengthened allergy season

Unfavorable
Sneezing frustrates attempts to look tough-as-heck

Favorable
Bandanna wearing in order to shield mouth and nose from pollen facilitates attempts to look tough-as-heck
I'm wondering why no one has ever attempted a cartoon series of "The Wind in the Willows"

And - forgive me, I know how predictable this is - I'm wondering if said book could be adapted as a post-apocalyptic tale. I think it may have the proper elements of rural isolation and danger.

notes

"Actual people interested in real sex here": spam title this morning. I like how honest it is: We will show you pictures of real live humans who are genuinely interested in having real sex. Not with you, mind you. But real sex, nonetheless.

Those are really hard to come by.

When coupled with a pre-shower NoDoz and soundtrack by early Stooges, my morning commute on the freeway yields the fantastic and confident joy of speeding and looping in and out of heavy traffic like some sort of speed-addled Japanese biker reeling down the road bathed in neon and car exhaust. Or maybe I've been reading too much Lester Bangs.

Even though we're talking about caffeine here and not speed, this ties pretty closely into one of my favorite pet theories: That the effects of drugs are increased massively by certain types of media (ie music). About ninety percent of the reason I don't own my own laptop right now is because it's simply too easy to get drunk and goof off online. The internet makes drunk idiocy so much easier. 100% of the reason I don't own a single DVD anymore is because the joy of getting pickled on some cheap quasi-sophisticated pint of liquor and re-watching movies I've practically memorized is as close to an emotional "womb" as I can think of. I imagine that if I (or anyone for that matter) had easy access to heroin or another of the more notorious downers my idea of an average Thursday night would be to take a couple and then watch re-runs of my favorite show. So: booze goes best with movies and TV. I'm tempted to draw some Cronenbergian conclusion from that (e.g. TELEVISION IS A DEPRESSIVE) but I think it has more to do with the fact that drinking and watching movies are both done sitting down.

March 27, 2008



I find great sartorial inspiration in old photographs of war casualties.

climbing



I like this because it combines visual signifiers of pretty girls and the apocalypse, and does so in a positive way.

It's hard to find positive or hopeful images of the apocalypse. It's also hard for me to find good memories of girls I've loved. So it's nice to see something that combines both in a such a bright and summery way.

I was partial to tragedy in my youth.



Burgess Meredith as Ammon in, of course, Clash of the Titans. Right here he's trying to spook Harry Hamlin's Theseus into gettin' out of town.


courtney, why don't you take some more lithium



His identity is confused so his face is confused. It's a pretty hackneyed method of conveying characterization through imagery but it works so well here.

Russian Roulette

It's kind of odd that so few films dramatically examine Russian roulette. Russian roulette has been featured as a method of intimidation (LA Confidential) or to indicate generic craziness (The Way of the Gun), but those scenes are drawn with broad strokes indeed.

The possibilities of psychology, motive and outcome involved in Russian roulette seem to point to dozens or hundreds of films, but I can't think of any film besides The Deer Hunter that realistically examines the motives or history of a person who would willingly play Russian roulette.

One round placed in a six-shot revolver results in a 1/6 (17%) chance of the revolver discharging the round. There are very few other dangerous situations in which the risk of death can be so easily and instantly determined.

Tad Friend on The Golden Gate Bridge as a Suicide Apex

At a 1977 rally on the Golden Gate supporting the building of an anti-suicide barrier above the railing, a minister, speaking to six hundred of his followers, tried to explain the bridge’s power. Matchless in its Art Deco splendor, the Golden Gate is also unrivalled as a symbol: it is a threshold that presides over the end of the continent and a gangway to the void beyond. Just being there, the minister said, his words growing increasingly incoherent, left him in a rather suicidal mood. The Golden Gate, he said, is “a symbol of human ingenuity, technological genius, but social failure.”

link


interestingly,

The Centers for Disease Prevention are also responsible for suicide prevention initatives?

this is happening.

9-year old heroin addicts in Dallas.

March 26, 2008

Andromeda Depicted

Here's the myth as digested by Wikipedia:

In Greek mythology, Andromeda was the daughter of Cepheus and Cassiopeia, king and queen of the Phoenician kingdom Ethiopia.

Her mother Cassiopeia bragged that she was more beautiful than the Nereids, the nymph-daughters of the sea god Nereus and often seen accompanying Poseidon. To punish the Queen for her arrogance, Poseidon, brother to Zeus and God of the Sea, sent a sea monster, Cetus, to ravage the coast of Ethiopia and the kingdom of the vain Queen. The desperate King consulted the Ammon, the Oracle of Zeus, who announced that no respite would be found until the king sacrificed his virgin daughter Andromeda to the monster. She was duly chained to a rock on the coast.

Perseus, returning from having slain the Gorgon Medusa, found Andromeda and slew the monster Cetus. He set her free, and married her in spite of Andromeda having been previously promised to Phineus. At the wedding a quarrel took place between the rivals, and Phineus was turned to stone by the sight of the Gorgon's head (Ovid, Metamorphoses v. 1).
It's such a simple and iconic piece. There are many ways to visually interpret the story:


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This really captures the essence of the story: There's a really pretty girl chained to a rock. She's being menaced by a terrifying sea monster and there's this guy with a sword who's going to save her. The action occurs on a rocky shoreline. Ideally the swordsman should be astride a flying horse wielding a severed head and the girl should be half naked.

It's interesting how some depictions of Andromeda focus on Theseus or the crowd, and others like this focus on the relationship between Andromeda and the monster, capturing the moment just before Theseus arrives and gets some slaughtering done.


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Perseus and Andromeda, Frederic Leighton

In this a Christian influence is quite evident: Theseus rides like an angel from the bright sky to defeat the sea monster blocking Andromeda from the light of the sun with his umbrella-like wing. This isn't the gods demanding punishment for having been slighted, this is good versus evil.


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Perseus and Andromeda, Paolo Veronese

I guess this is Medieval or Renaissance? What a wonderfully evil dragon-like sea monster. He reminds me of the sea monsters drawn in the fringes of old maps, sucking the dark froth of the sea into his black maw.

I like to imagine that the Pegasus-less Theseus is executing some Hong Kong wire-fu acrobatics here: He's in mid-spin and is going to end up astride the serpent, in the perfect position to stab him in the head.


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Andromeda, Boris Vallejo and Julie Bell

Calling this "Andromeda" is questionable. There's no Theseus and no chains. She's not even scared. It almost looks as if the two of them are flirting or having a conversation. I guess the monster's good company.


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Andromeda, Domenico Guidi

On the other hand, Andromeda here looks quite bored. The monster, not much larger than a dog, is barely able to keep her attention.


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Andromeda (1869), Edward Poynter

A particularly graceful depiction by Edward Poynter, who seems to have a knack for mythical women whom I immediately fall in love with (e.g. Cave of the Storm Nymphs). Andromeda looks both very afraid (as if the monster is just out of the scene and coming towards her) and very sensual, with her eyes closed and her head and hair atoss in the wind.


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Andromeda Chained to the Rock by the Nereids, Théodore Chassériau

I think this might be a detail of a larger work. Interestingly, her captors are all women (sea nymphs) as opposed to members of the local populace.


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La Délivrance d'Andromède, Pierre Mignard

I really like the multitude shown here: Serpent, Pegasus, Theseus, and Andromeda are all present. The head of Medusa has seemingly been tossed casually aside by a prideful Theseus. Andromeda's parents cower and beg behind Theseus. A crowd follows, lamenting and throwing their hands in the air. I'm very curious who the woman with the cloak outstretched in her hands is - perhaps she's going to contain the head of Medusa? And why are cherubs assisting in Andromeda's imprisonment?

It's as if an entire menagerie has formed a merry parade to accompany the players to the shore.


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Another that attempts to include many or all of the players in the myth. There's something vaguely Hieronymus Bosch in the multi-layered scene filled with violent or grotesque scenes: Medusa's head looks masculine in death. Pegasus bucks in panic. A group of women play and dance with what look like bloody branches of coral. Beasts and monsters swim behind them as the city looks on.


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Talisman of the Constellation Andromeda, Albertus Magnus De Mineralibus, c. 1260.
There's a great cartoonish simplicity to this: the entire thing is pared down to the necessary elements: Monster, girl, hero, and all are crammed economically into one tiny little frame.

I like that Theseus is wielding a scythe and Pegasus, usually depicted as graceful and swift, is weighted down by heavy chain and plate mail.


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And to bring it back home, here's Judi Bowker as Andromeda in
Clash of the Titans.





compare

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Gustave Dore

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Ray Harryhausen

Clash of the Titans

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Every one of my adult interests can be traced back to this film.

Monsters

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Romance

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Mythology

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Doom

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And, well...

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Christ, wasn't this a kid's movie?



Criteria for Truly Bad Films

I'm not sure I fully agree with these. (Numbers four and five seem particularly hard to defend). However, it’s interesting to see someone make this attempt, especially given the basically accidental nature of truly bad movies.


To qualify as one of the worst films of all time, several strict requirements must be met.
For starters, a truly awful movie must have started out with some expectation of not being awful.

Two, an authentically bad movie has to be famous; it can't simply be an obscure student film about a boy who eats live rodents to impress dead girls.

Three, the film cannot be a deliberate attempt to make the worst movie ever, as this is cheating.

Four, the film must feature real movie stars, not jocks, bozos, has-beens or fleetingly famous media fabrications.

Five, the film must generate a negative buzz long before it reaches cinemas; like the Black Plague or the Mongol invasions, it must be an impending disaster of which there has been abundant advance warning; it cannot simply appear out of nowhere.

Six, to qualify as one of the worst movies ever made, a motion picture must induce a sense of dread in those who have seen it, a fear that they may one day be forced to watch the film again - and again - and again.

link

March 24, 2008

Primer



jazz piano + fire

This would be truly "Herzogian" if it were either frequent or impromptu, but I suppose a single staged performance will have to do.

this is happening

Thousands of pilgrims made their way to Chimayo Friday in a traditional trek that is centuries old.

The pilgrims believe that dirt from a hole in the Santuario contains healing powers. An estimated 65,000 people make the pilgrimage each year.

Many of the trekkers can be seen rubbing dirt from the Santuario on themselves to alleviate ailments. According to Archbishop Michael Sheehan, the pilgrimage is a labor of hope for many.

-KOB (NBC New Mexico)
The past is never dead. It's not even past.
-Faulkner

Question re: Comedy and Cropping


This picture is funny, but it's funnier if you crop it so it's just his upper body.
What is the reason for that? Is the reason related to proportion and how the human eyes perceive focus in images, or related to psychology and society?

If the answer to that question is unavailable, what avenues of research and inquiry are available to me to find the answer?









































See?

o.k. corral

Does anyone know what O.K. stands for there? Is it just "Okay" or is it an actual acronym?

Garfield Variations





March 19, 2008





robert forster

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birthday cake for my brother's 21st

Skeleton found beneath Albuquerque home

ALBUQUERQUE (AP) - A man remodeling his 120-year-old Albuquerque home has found a human skeleton buried under the floor.

Epimenio Jaramillo says he and his brother were working on the home Tuesday when part of the floor collapsed.

They started digging and found a skull and other bones.

The state Office of the Medical Investigator estimates the bones are more than 200 years old and probably are those of an American Indian.

An archaeologist is to collect the bones, which likely will be given to a nearby pueblo.

(Copyright 2008 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)



These women are all guilty of one particularly horrible thing.

jacqueline williams
lisa montgomery
effie goodson
michelle bica

hello nurse

das schlitzohr der dritten kompanie

van morrison IS travis bickle























Greil Marcus, in a 2006 interview in
The Believer, said that Martin Scorsese told him that the first half of his movie Taxi Driver was based on Astral Weeks.





March 18, 2008

capsela were fun


volcanoes

volcano
volcano
volcano
volcano
volcano
volcano
volcano

best part of the Andromeda Strain film

ridley & tony scott miniseries of andromeda strain















Pros:

  • Good source material.
  • Lends itself well for update to present.
  • Ridley Scott.
Cons:
  • Judging from the photos on the website, there's at least one too many scientists. For a locked-room story like this, the number of protagonists is kind of important.
  • Tony Scott.
  • Cast:Eric McCormick of "Will and Grace" fame and Christa Miller of "The Drew Carey Show" as scientists entrusted with saving the human race.
Why'd they change the state to Utah? It was Arizona in the book and New Mexico in the film. Why change the state at all?

lunch

Eating salmon spread and a baguette for lunch.

God this stuff is good.

garfield minus garfield






I've been following this
religiously for weeks.
When you remove Garfield from the eponymous strip, Garfield becomes an amazing, exercise in schizophrenia, angst, and loneliness.
There's a sharp, deep pain running through the bones in my forearm this morning. I have no idea why, because I slept well and I didn't engage in any particularly strenuous activity last night.

It may be lingering rheumatoid arthritis due to a childhood disease. This is a possibility that worries me whenever I focus too intently on my health.
do kittens fall in love?

March 17, 2008

super size me

Has anyone tried this approach with another fast food establishment? Taco Bell? Seems risky but also potentially interesting.


...Or better yet with another cuisine. How would one fare if one were to eat nothing but Japanese fast food for a month?

Heh

Zora Neale Hurston was "purposefully inconsistent in the birth dates she dispensed during her lifetime, most of which were fictitious."

Migratory laborers outside of a juke joint, 1944


















Migratory laborers outside of a "juke joint" during a slack season, Belle Glade, Florida. Photographed by Marion Post Wolcott for the U.S. Farm Security Administration in 1944.
The sign above the door reads "ICE COLD JAX - THE DRINK OF FRIENDSHIP," as does the not-quite-visible sign on the left of the photo.

japanese equivalent of getting drunk in the 7-11 parking lot


A vendo is the slang name given to the activity of standing around a beer vending machine as a group and drinking.

question

What kind of person lends another person a gun? That seems really suspicious to me.

Month 3 of Buy Nothing New Compact

My goal this year: With the exception of food and medicine/cosmetics, to buy nothing new for twelve months. I've basically been attempting to live as if it's the post-apocalypse and all the stores have been emptied by looters. This is a big change, because I used to spend quite a bit of money on useless things. I blew a lot of money on weekly trips to Target.

So far, I feel like I've been successful. I feel like there are a couple of objectives of this Compact:
  • Environmental Impact: To reduce the harm to the environment.
  • Corporate Independence: To reduce one's reliance upon the basically destructive corporate structure of modern consumer society. As a rule, by buying only used, one's money goes to local small businesses.
  • Personal Enrichment: To foster creativity and problem-solving skills in overcoming those challenges which in non-Compact life are solved by buying something.
The third objective was kind of surprising - I thought this whole thing would be an interesting experiment in getting off the grid but I didn't expect its impact on my emotional status and problem-solving skillss, nor did I expect it to be so fulfilling. Example: My bathroom doorknob broke. I searched fruitlessly through a handful of surplus and used houseware shops (ReStore) for a doorknob of the right size. I ended up cannibalizing the closet doors in my house for parts, and in the process learned how a doorknob works. This may not be impressive to those of you who are skilled with your hands or who were gifted with an inborn mechanical ability, but any technical knowledge is a big step for me.

Similarly, I'm finding it a lot more fulfilling when I do buy things: when you have to search through antique shops and junk stores for something as simple as a box of staples, you start to really value those staples. The process of hunting the thing you need down becomes fun in itself, too.

All 3 objectives are closely intertwined, but what was surprising was the peace of mind that came with simply not entering into the want/need-purchase-fulfillment-crash cycle of buying things.

The main gray areas are in consumables and services: Things like razor blades, toilet paper, gasoline, and (significantly) scotch whiskey simply aren't available on the used market, and I lack the time or skill necessary to manufacture them. And how does something like a tire rotation or a massage fit in? I'm not sure how to fit those in the taxonomy of "new and used," but the guiding philosophy of this is to use less, and that informs my use of services and consumables.

I've made a few exceptions to the rule. A few I've attempted to justify and a few I'm outright embarrassed about. However, I will note that I think this guilt and embarrassment is a positive sign: I feel as if I've somewhat internalized the basic concept of buying less. (That's another thing: This has kind of taught me the value of guilt.) Here's the breakdown.

One pair of earrings, and one papercraft Charles Bronson
I bought both as gifts from Etsy.
I justified these to myself because I was buying pretty much directly from the craftsperson, and in that way they contribute to the Corporate Independence objective. As the middleman, Etsy takes a small percentage of the proceeds, but the rest of the money goes directly to the maker of the object. The earrings were made of found materials, which is good from an environmental standpoint. Those are kind of shoddy justifications, though, because when it comes down to it, I bought new things and I didn't really need them. I should have *made* gifts in both these instances.

A pack of plastic rubbermaid-style food containers
I was running low on them at home and I didn't think I'd be able to find used ones that weren't disgusting. On the other hand, I didn't really need them: I did have two left.

Tires and struts for my car
On the one hand, I feel pretty good about this: used struts weren't available and I'm hard enough on my car that refurbished tires would've been a terrible investment resulting in a blowout ... and a new set of tires. On the other hand, just maintaining and owning a car runs contrary to the Environmental Impact and Corporate Independence objectives. I'm too in thrall to the convenience of my car to really even consider getting rid of it, though, so this whole purchase is fraught with practical and philosophical problems.

A Moleskine sketchpad
There's no justification for this. None whatsoever.

I foresee some potential problems in the near future, too:

Chopsticks: I broke mine and could really use new ones. The only answer I can think of is to steal some of the plastic ones from an Asian restaurant, but I'd prefer to buy new than steal.
Reading Glasses: I don't need them yet, but I will, probably a pair of +1.00 magnification. I don't like the idea of buying used ones.
Laptop: After I move I'll need a new one. I had a used (refurbished) laptop that died quite quickly. I'm thinking of buying an Asus EEE, because they're very cheap and very no frills and seem as close as a new product can get to the spirit of buying used and less.

None of these upcoming purchases things are necessary, though, not in the sense that they're required for me to keep my heart beating, so the ultimate challenge may be simply doing without them. The upcoming move may present me with some challenges as well. Fortunately, I've accumulated enough stuff that my main problem will be deciding what not to bring with me.

good phrases

"in a pickle"

"furthest stool from the door"

March 14, 2008

Albuquerque Optimists Club, 1954

























The text reads "WHY WAIT TIL 1955,
WE MIGHT NOT EVEN BE ALIVE," a phrase which I presume is the refrain to a jovial drinking song about gin-soaked parties in the midst of the Cold War.


Pleased to discover one can type "beast wars" using only the left hand.

jugular wounds

I just looked in the mirror, and I've got a series of light (but noticeable) scratches on my neck. Parallel to my jugular, as if someone was trying to slit my throat the hard way.

Ghosts?

March 13, 2008

The face on Mars

That guy who popularized this? His name is Richard Hoagland and he lives in Placitas.
"Alas, to wear the mantle of Galileo it is not enough that you be persecuted by an unkind establishment, you must also be right."

numerology

Now that WinAmp and iTunes make this number easily accessible, why aren't psychics doing numerological analyses on the total length of people's music collections?
(My iTunes is 9:07:09:37 if anyone wants to attempt this).

facts (these are real)


NM is the last state in the US to use polygraphs in courts of law.

Police used a polygraph to clear a suspect in the "Green River" killings in 1984. The suspect has since confessed.

substance

Last Night: I spent most of last night and the night before reading a book called Cool, Hip and Sober: 88 Ways To Beat Booze and Drugs, by a former ad exec and drunk named Bill Manville.

It’s bad book. It’s repetitive and poorly proofread, and it’s structured in a patently artificial way. Manville’s from the wrong era to attempt to show that sobriety can be “cool” or “hip”. He’s the same age as Gloria Steinem, probably saw Hemingway flounce around Manhattan a couple of times. But it’s always good to hear drunks talk about how they stopped. There were little deeply buried ten-or-twelve word moments of recognition and insight.

Anyway, after I got tired of reading about ad execs with pints of gin stuffed in their overcoat pockets drunkenly boarding transatlantic flights, I ended up at a talk on North American Lake Monsters, but the world’s most experienced researched into Lake Monsters, Benjamin Radford. The talk was given by the New Mexicans for Science and Reason, who – against all logic –were all old cowboys. Who knew a handlebar mustache and an adherence to the scientific method could complement each other so well?

Radford, who was funny and intelligent and well-spoken, is an editor at the Skeptical Inquirer, as well as a very reputable cryptid researcher. I got the idea he genuinely did go into his research with an open mind, that he attempted the difficult task of clearing his mind of preconceptions and expectations. He looked like a network administrator. He was about 40 and dressed in utilitarian shoes and off-brand blue jeans, and had a squeaky-clean bald head. He went over data that most amateur cryptozoologists are familiar with, including the deathbed reveal that the Surgeon’s Photo is a hoax. One thing I didn’t know but had wondered about for a long time is that lake monsters are – almost exclusively – a recent (19th and 20th century) phenomenon. I’d like to hear something about non-Western lake creatures, because it strikes me that lake monsters can be interpreted as a pioneer response to a recently settled and foreign land – they’re a way to integrate and deal with both the fear of the land and the fear of the natives who were displaced. Kind of like how Mexican folklore calls the chupacubra a product of “US military experiments”: There’s a political element to cryptids that arise in the 19th and 20th centuries that I don’t think I know enough about.

Radford showed a series of videos to punctuate his talks, most of which aired on Discovery and National Geographic, and in those he wore a goatee. I’m formulating a theory that the choice to grow a goatee as a thirty year old is inherently linked to the choice to shave one’s head upon the onset of male pattern baldness as a forty-something. (Radford’s conclusion: There probably are no lake monsters on this continent.)

It was interesting but the point is it was something to do besides sit home and fret and worry and fidget and drink. I woke up this morning and my first thought was “Man, am I glad I didn’t get drunk last night.” Things were brighter and my breathing was stronger. I’m proud of myself, not for not drinking: With the exception of sleeping (which I still need a pill to do), I’ve got that down. I’m proud of myself doing something productive with the energy I typically use towards drinking.

Prediction: a sober me is going be much much weirder than a drunk me. I’m going to end up a total crackpot.

Tonight: Blade Runner: The Final Cut.

I’ve asked people how this compares to the other versions and all they can say is “It’s longer,” which seems…positive? Blade Runner is a great film, so more of a great film must be good…right?

Potentially embarrassing confession: I kind of prefer the US theatrical version (The one everyone involved in the film hates with Harrison ford doing a voiceover)

It’s not that it’s better edited or has a more interesting interpretation of the plot, it’s that Deckard’s voiceover really cements the noir quality of the film. Yes, it's awkward, but I feel like the science fiction and philosophical qualities of the film have received so much applause and so much focus that it’s difficult to remember that, at its heart, Blade Runner is a detective story.



"Shut up, be happy. Obey all orders without question. The happiness you have demanded is now mandatory."

-jello
i'm gonna turn into a crackpot and man i'm really excited about that

Strange Gnome Creature Terrorizes Town in South America

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This probably isn't real, but if it is, hoo boy.


More

things that are delicious with an indefinite article and actually kind of cool with a definite article

Blackberry(/ies).

things that are delicious with an indefinite article and bad with a definite article

Cranberries
Black-eyed peas
"At the end, I feel like everybody in the audience is my friend - we've gone through a battle and come out the other side. In the past, it had more of a confrontational vibe. We assaulted the audience, and they assaulted us back. This time it transcends that. By the encore, it seems like I want to invite everybody over to my house and sit around ... it's a strange connection that I don't remember being there, a vulnerability that wasn't apparent last time around."

-trent reznor
the receptionist loves edgar cayce, but doesn't trust john edwards.

hhmph.
i'm more worried about alien flora than fauna, to be honest.

james gulliver hancock

soy corvax. so listo.


Alert Crow, originally uploaded by MaryWit.

fact: lake monsters are not immune to bullets.

pankration

I love this word.

reminder

it only takes one thing to things restarted

opportunities

if you don't try for one, you miss two
This is a shallow hole, but once you get inside, it seems too deep to climb out of, because all you can think about is how long it took you to dig it.

March 12, 2008

Heaven's Gate Cult Speaks: Mass Suicide

FOUND IT (thanks joe)

sleeping couple


sleeping couple, originally uploaded by superbomba.

AND BRUCE LEE'S BURIED IN SEATTLE

Lee, Bruce b. November 27, 1940 d. July 20, 1973
Acclaimed Martial Artist, Actor, and Film Director. Balancing martial arts theory and film performance, Bruce Lee remains the most recognized martial artist of the twentieth century. Though born in San Francisco, Lee would move to Hong Kong with his family while still an infant and would act in several films there as a child. After losing a street fight in 1953, he would also study Wing Chun Kung Fu, a style emphasizing economy of movement. He would quickly become one of the most feared street...[Read More] (Bio by: Stuthehistoryguy)
Cause of death: Acute cerebral edema
Lake View Cemetery, Seattle, King County, Washington, USA
Plot: Lot 276, east side of circular driveway in center of cemetery
GPS coordinates: 47.6333, -122.3158 (hddd.dddd)

Smokey the Bear's buried here

Smokey the Bear d. 1976
Animal Folk Figure. In 1950, a huge forest fire in Lincoln National Forest, near Capitan, New Mexico, severely burned a four-month-old black bear cub. After his rescue, a district game warden took him to Santa Fe where he was nursed back to health. He was made a living symbol of the United States Forest Service's five-year-old fire prevention program and the bear was dubbed with the nickname "Smokey."
Lincoln National Forest, Near Capitan, New Mexico, USA

rhinoplasty and replcement with finger flesh


CP 1697 low, originally uploaded by otisarchives1.

fact: chickens are descended from unicorns

terror in flight

the only really scary part of flying is when the attendant doing the safety demonstration concludes by saying "Some of our cushions can be used as flotation devices."

Some of them.

undead email accounts p. 2

More on this:
  • Unused MySpace accounts expire and are deleted after six months of inactivity. So there's a 50% chance that someone who dies will increase in age by one year on Myspace for a short period.
  • It's a good thing MySpace accounts do expire, because if they didn't, we'd be left with disturbing reminders of people who passed on: According to MySpace, they'd continue to age but their photos would never be updated. So if you were to surf MySpace in 50 years you'd find, every once in a while, someone whose age is listed as "67" but whose photo is that of a 17 year old. That is strange.
  • My friends just had a baby and they blogged about it. People, including myself, left many comments of congratulations and happiness on the blog. In a dozen-odd years the baby will be able to read those good wishes himself. He'll have a crystal-clear record of his own birth and his own first days on earth.

What do these things mean?
I'll tell you what they mean: You know how your grandfather doesn't understand computers? When we get old we're going to have computers but we won't understand anything.

March 11, 2008

fact: melatonin production inhibits the expression of the gene responsible for lycanthropy.
fact: vampires kill because of their lack of reflection

altered states

"Emily tells me that she loves me but I don't know what that means. I think it means that she prefers the pain we inflict on each other to the solitary pain we would otherwise inflict upon ourselves."

Hippy Sippy

Women who performed involuntary C-sections on other women
Perp NameVictim NameChild survivedMother survived Date Location
Darci Kayleen Pierce Cindy Lynn Ray yes no July 1987 New Mexico
Jacqueline Annette Williams Deborah Evans yes no November 1995 Chicago, IL
Felicia Scott Carethia Curry yes no February 1996 Alabama
Josefina Saldana Margarita Flores no no October 1998 Fresno, CA
Lazerene Mannoe Tasmidah Ganief yes yes March 2000 Capetown, South Africa
Erin Brown Kathaleena Draper no no June 2000 Nevada
Michelle Bica Theresa Andrews yes no October 2000 Ohio
Charnetta Simmonsabduel Elsa Kaiser yes yes January 2003 Fullerton, CA
Effie Goodson Carolyn Simpson no no December 2003 Oklahoma
Name Unknown Sol Angela Cartagena yes yes November 2004 Girardot, Columbia
Lisa Montgomery Bobbie Jo Stinnett yes no December 2004 Missouri
Katie Smith Sarah Brady yes yes February 2005 Kentucky

If Othello had been in Hamlet’s place, and vice versa, there would be no tragedy.

"Sometimes the gray guy just stays gray"

-Michael Kenneth Williams

March 10, 2008

questions

Who boards the lifeboats first on a ghost ship?


Do ghost sailors on a ghost ship use astrolabes, or are they limited to their bare eyes on the sky to navigate?


Do ghost seamen mutiny?


A forgiving expanse of empty tables


The Specialist with the sound off: A nourish introspective quality the audiovisual version lacks.




He had a low need for cocktails that didn’t let him turn into his father.


You haven’t lost your father because he’s in that valley now.


You disgust me but you’re beautiful.



The brown house, a wooden two-story building with a space below it that would have been a basement if it had been finished but that’s full of two inches of water now, is falling apart. It’s falling apart just like every house headed by a Lacher.

-

-

I got a job designing the graphics on beer cans, which, considering how much I drink, is ironic-but-not-really in that modern way. I’m a bad graphic designer, but I drink enough to know this: Cans are methods of getting customers but it doesn’t matter what the graphic is. I’ll buy liquor no matter what. So I don’t feel guilty that I’m a bad graphic designer.

-

My recycling bin is peppered with red and bronze 16-oz cans of Tecate. They look like roses on a bush. More accurately, they swim through the tin and steel and glass like great oblong koi.

-

Food so good having it in your stomach makes you wish you were crying.

-

This chicken’s so good I feel like I’m in church.


-

The basics of my religion are the ruins of cheap rocks and quick chicks.

-

He’s gone into some sort of chrysalis but I can tell by the coloration that the butterfly will not want him there.

-

Mutually exclusive fantasy universes.

-

Who boards the lifeboats first on a ghost ship?


Do ghost sailors on a ghost ship use astrolabes, or are they limited to their bare eyes on the sky to navigate?


Do ghost seamen mutiny?

-

Prepare yourself for the worst experience in the world.

-

All my dead bodies are in one place, she says, but she’s forgotten that the mortuary lost her father’s ashes.


Light poured in through the double windows into my bedroom, coaxing shadows out of the low bookshelves and splashing oblong spots of orange-yellow over my jeans. The day was bright and cold, and without wind. The treetops, deprived of the bulk of gtheir leaves, filtered the winter light with difficulty. The sun blasted like a trumpet outside, brassy and crisp.

movies that could be remade with the setting changed to the post-apocalyptic future 2

without significantly changing the plot arc

  • of mice and men
  • vanishing point
  • high plains drifter

The Alien landed...


The Alien landed..., originally uploaded by Thomas Reichart.

flesh for frankenstien


Picture 4, originally uploaded by Skipper Bartlett.

undead email accounts

Gmail, hotmail, etc. All have them. What happens to them when people die? The accounts of those who die taking their passwords and usernames and even their existence to the grave. They accrue spam and automatic newsletters and emails from people who don’t know they’re dead. Like a mailbox that never changes owners or addresses.

March 6, 2008

movies that could be remade with the setting changed to the post-apocalyptic future

without significantly changing the character arc

  • in the name of the rose
  • song of the south

swear to god
think about it

what if

you ever meet those old lonely men who live alone even thought they're real old
and when you say "djoo ever get married" they say "no, there was one girl once, but i never got married"

well

that's my nightmare, that's what i worry about, that's who i'm scared of turning into

it'd be a sad day if everyone came to my funeral and it was more people than i ever knew loved me because i'd be dead to see how wrong i was

March 4, 2008

misplaced academic mindsets

Generation after generation, that's what we are. Academics.

We shoulda been professors. We're theory men, but circumstance has shoehorned us into careers as farmers and businessmen.

We shoulda been professors, all of us.

2/29/08


2/29/08, originally uploaded by olvide3.

adios golden west
adios launchpad (for the forseeable future)

gringo


gringo, originally uploaded by nicolas cage vampire teeth.

halloween

Badlands


Badlands, originally uploaded by nicolas cage vampire teeth.

who's been in space the most?

my old boss

Polanski and Sharon Tate

I had that dream about her again last night.

The one where there's six of her. I betray five and the sixth forgives me and we're happy.

I don't believe that each person has one true love. I believe that we get many chances to have lives full of love.

What I do believe is that one person can damage you so badly that you can't respond when your next true love comes along. I believe that the mistakes you make with one person can break you.

March 3, 2008

montgomery.


montgomery., originally uploaded by jonwalters.

Lake Superior in Winter - Near Duluth, Minnesota


















This is why we left.

Delusions of Parasitosis

Delusions of parasitosis (DP) manifest in the patient's firm belief that he or she has pruritus due to an infestation with insects. Patients may present with clothing lint, pieces of skin, or other debris contained in plastic wrap, on adhesive tape, or in matchboxes. They typically state that these contain the parasites; however, these collections have no insects or parasites. This presentation is called the matchbox sign, or what the authors term the "Saran-wrap sign."

This my favorite thing right now.

Biozombie


Biozombie, originally uploaded by H L Windcrampe.

l'enfant a l'orange - van gogh.